Checkin' In
4F22 - 21st September 1997
[Judge]
How do you find the defendant?
[Jury Foreman]
He's guilty of mayhem, exposure indecent
[Jurist #1]
Freaked out behaviour, both chronic and recent
[Jury]
Drinking and driving, narcotics possession
[Jurist #2]
And that's just page one of his ten page confession!
[Judge]
I should put you away where you can't kill or maim us,
But this is LA and you're rich and famous!
[Young Celebrity]
I'm checkin' in!
[Doctors & Patients]
He's checkin' in!
[Young Celebrity]
I'm checkin' in!
[Doctors & Patients]
Checkin', checkin' in!
[Young Celebrity]
No more pills or alcohol, no more pot or Demorol,
No more stinking fun at all! I'm checkin' in!
[Doctors & Patients]
He's checkin' in! He's checkin' in!
[Doctor]
No more looking pale and thin, no more bugs beneath your skin!
[Young Celebrity]
Hey, that's just my aspirin!
[Doctors & Patients]
Chuck it out!
[Doctors & Patients]
You're checkin' in!
«
Those Were the Days
3G02 - 19th October 1997
Boy, the way the Bee Gees played
Movies John Travolta made
Guessing how much Elvis weighed
Those were the days
And you knew where you were then
Watching shows like Gentle Ben
Mister, we could use a man like Sheriff Lobo again
"Disco Duck" and Fleetwood Mac
Coming out of my eight-track
Michael Jackson still was black
Those were the days
Bart was feeling mighty blue
It's a shame what school can do
For no reason, here's Apu
Those were the days
«
Canyonero
5F10 - 22nd February 1998
Can you name the truck with four wheel drive,
Smells like a steak, and seats thirty five?
Canyonero! Canyonero!
Well, it goes real slow with the hammer down
It's the country-fried truck endorsed by a clown
Canyonero! Canyonero!
Hey, hey!
Twelve yards long, two lanes wide,
Sixty five tons of American pride!
Canyonero! Canyonero!
Top of the line in utility sports,
Unexplained fires are a matter for the courts!
Canyonero! Canyonero!
She blinds everybody with her super high beams
She's a squirrel-squashin', deer-smackin' drivin' machine
Canyonero! Canyonero! Canyonero!
Whoa, Canyonero! Whoa!
«
The Garbage Man Can
5F09 - 26th April 1998
[Homer]
Who can take your trash out
Stomp it down for you
Shake the plastic bag and do the twisty thingie do?
The Garbage Man!
[Garbage Men] Yes the Garbage Man Can!
[Homer & Garbage Men]
The Garbage Man can
And he does it with a smile
And never judges you
[Marge] Who can take this diaper?
[Garbage Man] I don't mind at all!
[Chief Wiggum] Who can clean me up before the big policeman's ball?
The Garbage Man!
[Garbage Men] Yes the Garbage Man can
[U2]
The sanitation folks
Are jolly friendly blokes
Courteous and easygoing
[The Edge] They'll mop up when you're o-
[U2 & Garbage Men] -ver flowin'!
[Bono] And tell you when your arse is showing!
[Apu] Who can?
[Sideshow Mel] Who can?
[Ned Flanders] Who can?
[Oscar the Grouch] Who can?
[All] The Garbage Man can!
[Bart & Lisa] Coz he's Homer Simpson, man!
[All] He cleans the world for you!
«
Luke Be A Jedi Tonight
AABF05 - 20th December 1998
[Mark Hamill]
Luke be a Jedi tonight!
Just be a Jedi tonight!
[Mark Hamill & Backing Chorus]
Do it for Yoda while we serve our guests a soda!
[Mark Hamill]
And do it for Chewie and the Ewoks, and all the other puppets
[Mark Hamill & Backing Chorus] Luke, be a Jedi tonight!
«
Kids Vs Adults
AABF07 - 17th January 1999
[Kids] Adults!
[Adults] Kids!
[Kids] Adults!
[Adults] Kids!
[Kids] Adults!
[Reverend Lovejoy]
Kids, you've had your fun, now we've had our fill!
[Homer]
Yeah, you're only here 'cause Marge forgot her pill!
[Wiggum]
Kids, you're all just scandalising, vandalizing punks!
[Krusty]
Channel hoppin', Ritalin-poppin' monkeys...
But please don't quit the fan club!
[Marge]
Kids, I could nag and nag 'til my hair turns blue!
[Mrs Krabappel]
Kids, you burn my smokes and don't say "Thank you!"
[Rod & Todd Flanders]
Why can't you be like we are?
[Adults]
Oh, what a bunch of brats!
[Moe]
We oughta drown you just like cats!
[Bart]
Adults! You run our lives like you're Colonel Klink!
[Nelson]
Adults! You strut around like your farts don't stink!
[Lisa]
Adults! You're such a drooling, snoring, boozing, boring bunch!
Surly, meany, three-martini lunchers!
[Ralph]
I just ate a thumbtack!
[Milhouse]
Adults! They're always tellin' us to-
[Grampa]
Shut your traps!
[Jasper]
Eh, we're fed up with all you whipper-snaps!
[Seniors]
We're trying to get some sleep here, it's almost six-fifteen!
What's the matter with-
[Adults]
Don't you treat us like-
[Kids]
Can't you just lay off-
[Seniors]
We're sick of all of you!
[All]
Kids today!
«
Zorro Rap
AABF19 - 7th November 1999
From the Z to the O to the double R-O
He's the dude in the mask from the barrio
With his horse and his mask and his big old sword
He'll cut your butt from a '52 Ford
«
Osaka Seafood Concern Company Loyalty Song
AABF20 - 16th May 1999
Knife-a goes in
Guts-a come out
That's what Osaka Seafood Concern is all about!
«
Stretch Dude & Clobber Girl Theme Song
BABF01 - 31st October 1999
Stretch Dude and Clobber Girl!
He's a human rubber band
And she's the Hulk in pearls!
He's a limber lad
She's a powerful lass
He'll wring your neck
And she'll kick your ass!
They're Stretch Dude,
And Clobber Girl!
Stretch Dude, Clobber Girl!
Stretch Dude, Clobber Girl!
«
Testify!
BABF06 - 16th January 2000
[Bart] I was a sinner, a real bad kid
What thou shalt not, I shalt did
Neighbours cat I tried to neuter
Took a whizz on the school computer
[Sherri & Terri] He took a whizz, oh yes he did!
[Bart] But now I've changed, you can't deny
Come on up and testify!
[Sherri & Terri]
Testify!
Testify!
Come on up and testify!
[Grampa] My hip's misbehavin!
[Sherri & Terri] Testify!
[Patty] Got a nicotine craving!
[Sherri & Terri] Testify!
[Professor Frink] There's a cramp in my glavin!
[Sherri & Terri] Testify!
[Bart, Sherri & Terri] Testify!
[All] Testify!
«
Jockeys' Song
BABF09 - 6th February 2000
[Jockeys] Freaks, freaks, freaks!
We are the jockeys, jockeys are we
We live underground in a fiberglass tree
[Jockey #1] Ha!
[Jockey #2] Ooo!
[Jockey #3] Haha! 'Tween Earth and Hell, we reign supreme
[Jockey #4] On toadstool thrones by a chocolate stream
[Jockey #5] But all is not well in Jockey Town
[Jockey #6] Your renegade horse is making us frown
[Homer] What do you want me to do?
[Jockey #7] Your horse must lose
[Homer] My horse must lose?
[Jockey #7] No win!
[Jockey #8] No show!
[Jockey #3] No place!
[Jockey #4] Just lose the stinkin' race
[Homer] And what if I refuse to lose?
[Jockey #8] We'll eat your brain
[Homer] My horse must lose!
«
A Book About a Man
BABF10 - 13th February 2000
In a motel room in Delacroix
I was drinking like a Dartsmouth boy
And thinkin' 'bout the wrong turns that I took
Well I woke up on the puke green floor
And opened up a dresser drawer
Lookin' for a bottle but instead I found a book
A book about a man
A book about the dude who lives above
A book about a man
Who drives a pickup full of sweet, sweet love
Now if you think he doesn't care
Or maybe that he isn't there
It's not too late to see how wrong you are
So when your soul has gone astray
Just let God be your Triple-A
He'll tow you to salvation and he'll overhaul your heart
«
Put It In Your Cap
CABF01 - 19th November 2000
When you get a penny from a chum
Don't just buy some bubble-gum
Put it in your cap, put it in your cap
When you find a nickel in the snow
Don't just blow it on a picture show
Put it in your cap, put it in your cap
When you spy a quarter in a pie...
«
This Log
CABF01 - 19th November 2000
[Chorus]
This log is your log
This log is my log
When lightning struck it
It kicked the bucket!
[Moe]
I poured some onions
Inside my trousers
[Chorus]
This log, it used to be a tree
Now it spreads love to you and me
Hey look, it's heading out to sea!
«
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